Ensight – Jeremy Wright

… And a 300C, and a Durango, and a Crossfire, and a RAM SRT10, and, and, and…

This weekend, Chrysler came to town with their Gold Medal Tour. 4 courses, try as many cars as you want.

While the experience was well done and I really enjoyed the whole 3 hours, I ultimately left with the feeling that I couldn’t imagine myself buying this car. More on this after each car.

Off Roud Course

This was basically the entire family of Jeep cars that you took on a circular courses. Several large hills, loads of “holy crap is this going to flip” situations. Great for showing how much the car could handle while keeping you comfortable. I tried out a Grand Cherokee Laredo. I’d always wanted this car when I was younger. Good stuff.

The GC was comfortable, handled well, had great power and was everything I thought I’d want in an SUV. Ultimately, though, after 10 minutes in it, I just couldn’t see myself driving it every day. It wasn’t so bad I’d say “kick me if I ever buy this!”… Just wasn’t anything to take my breath away. Felt just like I expected it to, which I suppose is a good thing.

Street Course

I was very impressed that Chrysler let participants take as many street course runs as they wanted. It was basically an 8-block tour, all in a line, but there was enough leeway that you definitely got to see the power of the car, get a feel for it and see how it handled.

I took out a Crossfire (had no reason to take out the Pacifica, PT Cruiser, etc, that were also on offer). I really, really liked the Crossfire. In fact, the only thing I didn’t like was that it was a 2-seater. I know it’s a 2-seater, but that is the only reason I can’t see myself buying one: because I don’t see a time where I can afford to have a car just for 2 people (family of 4 here).

Thrill Course

Ahh, gotta love the big engines! They had the SRT4 (a “Neon” with a huge engine); the RAM SRT10 (550hp in a pickup) and the Viper. I took them in that order, as I didn’t want to spoil anything. Each was very, very good, and more exciting than the one before. While the SRT4 wasn’t bad, I’d never own a Neon (too small); so I wouldn’t own one of those. I wouldn’t be an SRT10 as I can’t see myself ever buying a truck and, well, who can see themselves owning a Viper?

ESP Course

Chrysler has developed a new ‘traction control system’ which has 2 components: the ability to tell where the car IS going vs where it’s SUPPOSED to be going, and ‘extreme’ traction control (doesn’t just apply brakes, also revs engine down and stops wheels while maintaining traction).

On this course I tried out the 300C (there was also the Magnum… But why buy a station wagon?). VERY NICE CAR. Cushy, classy, handled very well, the ESP system made for amazing control (especially considering the size of this car) and it was just very responsive. I told it to do something and it just jumped. Good stuff.

The only reason I couldn’t see myself buying the 300C is that I’m not 60 years old. Sure, I drive a poor man’s jag, but something about it suits me. The 300C didn’t.

In Summation

Well, the cars I definitely enjoyed and could nearly see myself buying were:

- Grand Cherokee
- Crossfire
- 300C

Each of these didn’t appeal to me in some small way, though. Thankfully I still have 5 years left on my lease, so I won’t be in the market anytime soon. That said, maybe in 5 years I’ll be looking for an SUV or a van or whatever.

Either way, the show was very well done, everything was fantastic and nothing about any of the cars really screamed “DON’T BUY ME!!!” (except for the fact that the PT Cruiser was, well… A PT Cruiser).

If you are expecting one of my normally insightful, humorous and completely unbiased reviews you should probably go somewhere else. The entire time I was considering going to see this movie, driving to the theatre, standing in line for my ticket, buying it, getting food, entering the theatre, waiting, watching trailers and actually watching the movie I was asking myself:

WHY THE HELL AM I WATCHING A DOCUMENTARY IN A THEATRE?!!!

…

I am still asking myself this question now.

It isn’t that the movie was bad, or good… It’s just that I’m generally a big proponent of only seeing ‘theatre movies’ (movies that actually benefit somehow from being in the theatre) at the theatre. Maybe I’m just old fashioned that way.

How was the movie itself? I’ll leave it to Memeslider to do the actual ‘review’.

For me, it was the only time I’ve ever heard someone talking during an entire movie. Somehow, he didn’t appreciate it when I coughed loudly and turned to glare at him. So much so that he told me to “turn around faggot”. Blowing him a kiss, apparently, didn’t help his mood any. Pity.

By and large, myself and the audience enjoyed the ‘movie’. For me, there were bits where I was rolling my eyes, but most of it was:

Oh yeah, I forgot about that!

I forgot how helpless I felt after 9/11. I forgot that there were real people in Iraq. I forgot how it would have felt to be a mother of a person on active duty. I didn’t buy into many of the innuendos in the movie, but the facts were fairly clear. Yes, getting rid of Saddam was good. But that was just about the only good thing in foreign politics that Bush did during the last 4 years.

I still don’t know who I’d vote for, but it’s with a heavier heart. Adding up American soldiers’ deaths, removal from service due to injury, Iraqi civilian deaths and Iraqi military deaths and injuries there have been more than 100,000 victims of this ‘war’. A large part of me just wants to scream out “OKAY, THAT’S ENOUGH!!!”

And, to be honest, I think that’s the part I’d vote with.